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Quote of the Month

The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out for himself, without regard to the prevailing superstitions and taboos. Almost inevitably he comes to the conclusion that the government he lives under is dishonest, insane and intolerable, and so, if he is romantic, he tries to change it. And even if he is not romantic personally he is very apt to spread discontent among those who are.

ó H.L. Mencken (1922)

~ Oct 13, 2015 ~

From the 
Collateral Genocide Dept.

Rules? Me??

From the LogoPhere News Room   

Unknown to most of LogoPhere's four regular readers, like all top news agencies LogoPhere has an anonymous source inside the White House.  Ours is named Lamont Rufus Washington.  Lamont was nominated by President Barak Obama in 2009 and quickly confirmed by Congress in 2014 as White House janitor-in-chief.  It was the first and last thing Obama and Congress ever agreed on. Lamontís area of operation includes cleaning the presidential editing room where Obama personally edits the tapes of CBS "60 Minutes" interviews before they are aired.

Our anonymous source, Lamont, has just advised the LogoPhere staff Ė consisting entirely of me and my pot-bellied pig,  Officer Pickles, who answers the LogoPhere 911 hot line and justifies our use of the first person plural Ė that last night he recovered from the floor of the WH editing room a short section of tape that was deleted from Steve Kroftís interview with Barak Obama that aired on "60 Minutes" on Oct11.2015.

LogoPhere is now releasing a transcript of the part of the interview that the American people never saw.  [Cue: drum roll.]

. . .

SK: I want to talk about the-- this program, because it would seem to show, I mean, if you expect 5,000 and you get five, it shows that somebody someplace along the line did not-- made-- you know, some sort of a serious miscalculation.

BO: You know, the-- the-- Steve, let me just say this.

SK: It's an embarrassment.

BO: Look, there's no doubt that it did not work. And, one of the challenges that I've had throughout this heartbreaking situation inside of Syria is, is that-- you'll have people insist that, you know, all you have to do is send in a few-- you know, truckloads full of arms and people are ready to fight. And then, when you start a train-and-equip program and it doesn't work, then people say, "Well, why didn't it work?" Or, "If it had just started three months earlier it would've worked."

[begin snip]

SK: So whom did you fire?

BO: Huh?

SK: Well, to hear you tell it, sir, some military genius came to you with this plan that was -- with all due respect -- the most cockamamie stunt since Kennedyís idiot CIA director John McCone tried to take out Fidel Castro with an exploding cigar. And . . .

BO: Whoa, Steve.  I thought the cigar idea was pretty spiffy stuff, míself. I mean it only cost the US taxpayer $2 for a pack of firecrackers and $20 for a box of a dozen outlawed Cuban cigars, 9 of which Kennedy smoked, and 2 of which LBJ smoked. Win - win - win, dude. I mean, if it had worked, of course. . .and it always worked for The Three Stooges.

SK: Thatís precisely my point, Mr. President. The stooges in this story -- were they fired? 

As we have already noted, your cockamamie plan cost the American taxpayer half a billion bucks and produced a total of 6 trained Sunni to take on both ISIS and the entire Syrian Arab Army while over 5000 CIA-trained soldiers and hundreds of millions of dollars of US war gear have ended up in the hands of al-Nusra and ISIS. So if what you are telling us is true Ė that the military stooges talked you into this Ė then surely you fired the whole Joint Chiefs of Stooges, including top stooge Joseph Dunford. I mean, isnít there any accountability around here for taxpayersí money?

BO: Cockamamie? Now hold on, Steve. Youíre pissiní on the US military here, boy. Youíre just not seeing the genius of the deeper plan. I mean, how else could we supply ISIS and Nusra with the stuff they need to take out Bashar al-Assad without being accused of supporting terrorists? That $500 million would have been money well spent if those bloodthirsty Wahhabi insurgents had been given enough time to beat the SAA. But then Putin had to stick his nose in and mess it all up. Just like our over-turning Yanukovyichís elected government in Ukraine Ė Putin steps in and fucks it all up just when we thought it was a done deal. If Putin now wipes out ISIS, and al-Nusra, and all the other blood-thirsty Wahhabi running around Syria, who will be left to take out Assad?  Do you see why we're so upset about Putin stepping in here?

SK: So, let me see if Iíve got this straight, Mr. President: Even though ISIS has decapitated Americans James Foley, Stephen Sotloff, and Peter Kassig, and raped, tortured, and killed American Kayla Mueller, and even though ISIS, al-Nusra, and the other violent Sunni groups have executed over 10,000 people, your real Machiavellian plan was to provide weapons and trained men to the decapitating terrorist groups while appearing to bolster the moderates? You people knew all the while that these American-trained soldiers and hundreds of millions of American dollars worth of offensive weaponry would fall into the hands of al-Nusra and ISIS, and al-Nusra and ISIS would use that gear to take down Assad. Was that the plan?  You would rather ISIS be in control of Syria than Assad? Are you freaking crazy?

BO: No, no, no, Steve, calm down. Thatís just the stress talkiní, man. You have to connect all of the dots, not just the obvious ones. The plan was that if we could keep this ISIS thing going long enough, ISIS/al-Nusra and the SAA would reciprocally and collectively bleed each other to death and then we, with our partner in the Middle East, Israel, would waltz in and clean it all up and turn the whole wasted country into another occupation zone like the West Bank. That would virtually guarantee us Lebanon, and we would then be in a perfect position to take out Hezbollah and Iran.

We just wanted to fuel the fire long enough to let Assad and the insurgents tear each other to pieces.

SK: But what about hundreds of thousands of dead Syrians and millions of refugees?

BO: Thatís the beauty of the plan, Steve. I mean, when we and the Israelis take over the place, the fewer Syrians that are left, the better. Itís the same principle as the Jewish terrorists killing and running off as many Palestinians as possible back in the 1940's when they took over Palestine. The Joint Chiefs and I refer to it affectionately as "collateral genocide."  Netanyahu calls it "self-defense." Whatever.

SK: But arenít there some sort of rules or international laws against genocide, and against this sort of a surreptitious attack on a sovereign government, and against contributing to the deaths of hundreds of thousands of people?

BO: Rules?  Me??

[end snip]








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